Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Oasis recording louder, more psychedelic songs for seventh studio album


Not much more I can say about it that NME or BBC doesn't already tell you...so here are the links:


Should be a good effort. Well, it kind of has to be...my personal opinion is that they've been getting better since 2000's terrible Standing on the Shoulder of Giants, so hopefully they improve on their last album which had more highs than their previous two works combined.


Radiohead, Oasis, AND the Verve succeeding in the US at the same time again? I never had to leave the year 1997, did I? Maybe they should make a Back to the Future IV with me as Marty McFly, trying to change the future so Oasis wouldn't make Be Here Now so bloated. Yeah, that'll work...anyone for Zemeckis' number?

Monday, October 29, 2007

Being a Boston Sports Fan

Well, this has as much to do with my own personal tastes for international football and formula one racing as it does with Boston. But since I simply can't put into words how f***ing cool it is to see the Red Sox AGAIN sweep the World Series (uh, Terry Francona is now the winningest manager in postseason baseball history...thinking Belichick yet?), I'll just highlight everything going right in my own personal sports universe at this moment:

  • World Series Champions - 2004 & 2007 Boston Red Sox. Now the class of the league. Much like the Patriots, soon to be hated for winning by too many runs in a game for too long a stretch of time, after they find Francona stealing signs from opposing teams.
  • Super Bowl Champions - New England Patriots - 2001, 2003, 2004, 2007. Ok, the last one isn't set in stone yet. But the last three weeks saw scores of 48-21, 49-28, and 52-7. Two of those wins were against teams with winning records; one of those wins (Dalas) was against a team that was 5-0 and is now 6-1. We're seeing one of the best football teams ever assembled in a league of parity, tear it up against everyone, including the now-infamous "eff you" touchdowns that the Patriots are simply not holding back, despite the potential for backlash down the line (okay, not down the line, it's already happening).
  • 2007 Formula One - Constructors' and Drivers' Championship - Ferrari. After Schumacher left last year, finishing second, Kimi Raikkonnen steals the driver's title this year away from hot rookie Lewis Hamilton and teammate/sworn enemy to Hamilton, Fernando Alonso (2-time defending champ). It was the first time in twenty-plus years that there was a three-way battle for the championship, and Raikkonnen had the lowest chance of winning, but they gutted it out.
  • 2006 World Cup Champions, automatic qualifiers for 2010 World Cup, and contenders for the 2008 European Cup - Italia. As I've stated here before, another "eff you" team...can't get enough of that.

Did I mention that Kevin Garnett is playing for the Celtics and even the Bruins are showing signs of a bright future with a couple of amazingly talented young players? I think everyone outside of New England hates us about now...I wouldn't have it any other way.

As long as the Sox keep Lowell & Manny, & don't bother with A-Rod, all should remain well for the foreseeable future.

Patriots beat Redskins, 327-0

That's what it felt like. The Patriots scored the most points they have all season and the most since 1978 in a single game. I have many sentiments about this year's Patriots team, so I have to bullet point them before this turns into yet another four-page special. Before I do that, though, let me share an exchange I had with GB earlier today...yes, it involves meat. Read from the bottom of the bolded section up as it's an email exchange.


From: GB
Subject: You love it

...by the way, you are one f****d up individual.

From: Me
Subject: You love it

Hey I was in xxxx for halloween..not sure if i texted you but did i tell you that i scared off a guy who was hanging around us & wouldn't go away by telling him of my desire to dress up us Nick the Nazi (yes, I used that word) from Falling Down? The guy was kinda...f***ed up..and he took a picture of the four of us outside ****'s place...then wouldn't leave. He was talking about wanting to be some female cartoon character from the 80's next year for Halloween. So in my half-drunken state I said "dude, i wanna be NICK THE NAZI next year...you know the guy from Falling Down? Come on, Michael Douglas? Have you seen it??" and he talked to me for maybe 20 more seconds until he just said "uh, well i gotta go now....".

I F****G RULE...MEAT HELMETS ALL AROUND!


From: GB
Subject: Re: You love it

No refinery. It would be frightening to look up and see Rosy Colvin or Mike Vrabel barreling at you with grissel hanging from the side of their mouths, blood running down their respective chins and mad cow and/or salmonella shooting out of their pores...

From: Me
Subject: You love it

The best would be if the fans ate it...and that was part of the ceremony. Crowned with a hat of meat, Belichick walks through the bleachers - or better yet, walks down a red carpet on the field where his players hungrily wait to take a big wet bite out of the meat-hat. That would RULE. Then mangini would have to watch with his maggot-infested lid while the Pats players fatten up on raw tenderloin.

Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh meat-eats!

Dude, these are the things that go through my mind. What the f**k is wrong w/ me???

At the same time, is there any better way to show your dominance in football over another team by ripping into raw meat in front of them, served up by the coach? You know this should happen...albeit in a more refined form, if that's possible...


From: GB:
RE: you love it

Yah, one guy's got angus adorning his squash and the other's wearing rotted, maggot-infested, spoiled bovine atop his lid?

From: Me
Subject: RE: you love it

dude, he should force-fit a HAT OF MEAT on him (hatsofmeat.com). That would rule. Imagine a meathat game? where the loser has to wear a hat made of grade D meat, and the winner gets to wear a tenderloin meat hat? YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MEAT-FEST, PART I! YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

From: GB
Subject: RE: you love it

I want Belichick to slap Man-gina in the face with a hunk of pork.

From: Me
Subject: you love it

YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! GB RULES! 52-7 WIN BY THE PATS! I WANT THEM TO SCORE 100 WHEN THEY PLAY THE JETS IN DECEMBER YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

~~~~~~~~~~~~


Oh, and yes, I really am that classy. F**k you.


  • In terms of points, the Patriots are putting up a ton, of course...a little more than the 2000 St. Louis Rams. The difference? St. Louis needed to score those points in a lot of games and didn't win a couple close defensive battles that year. The Patriots are dominating every phase of the game.
  • OK, they go for it on fourth-and-one with a 38-0 lead in the 4th quarter. If they kick the field goal they're up 41-0. If they turn the ball over on downs, it's Redskins ball. They let the QUARTERBACK sneak the ball in on a 4th and 1, and that's running up the score...?
  • Let's say they are running up the score. Doesn't matter what the reasons are, the point is, you're in the NFL to win. So what, you lose by 28 points or 48 points...the Patriots have a great offense, and the best coach and best QB in the game. Should they take a knee? Should their defensive ends eat donuts for eight straight days and get lazy to give other teams a chance?
  • I've said for a while - even in this blog - that I wanted to see the Pats hurt teams back in 2005 before the season started. Now they're doing it. Part of me cringes when they go for the "Eff You" touchdown, because they are putting a huge target on their back whenever they leave starters in needlessly for plays like that. But most of me - the part that loves Be Here Now stubbornly, the part that would buy a $180,000 S-Class Mercedes if I won the lottery...ya know, that part...loves it.
  • I can't wait for the Colts game. I think Bill is really just firing up his team to go in to Indy with so much confidence, nothing will stop them. I think it'll be a good game but the Pats pull away in the second half for something like a 48-21 win.
  • I don't blame Belichick one bit for coaching the way he is. He's like a kid in a candy store with all those offensive weapons. He's using them. Big deal. I don't feel bad for millionaire athlete crybabies who try to call out the Patriots for running up the score. You're a man, not a baby - deal with it, take your licks and move on. Our politically correct, passive-aggressive culture is silly - be good, but not too good. Dominate, but not by too many points. This is parity, people; don't mock that by beating up on all the teams that aren't as good as you. Bullshit. Guess those Harvard & MIT kids should leave school because they're smart and it would offend too many people if they were too smart. No one had a problem with the Pats when they won by scores like 12-0 and had an occasional offensive outburst, like 31-0 against Buffalo to end the regular season in 2003. Now that they're embarrassing teams, something's wrong with it because they have the talent to do so. I don't get it...typical anti-New England bias from the football community, because the QB's last name isn't Manning and the Patriots aren't from Heartland, USA. Just like with Boston College...I could take them or leave them, but I kinda like that they will piss the entire football community off in a big way if they win the National Championship.

Friday, October 26, 2007

Stabbings

Boston - it's a stabbing good time!

WS - Game 2 - Red Sox win, 2-1


...and now have a 2-0 lead in the Series. Not that Tito or Epstein needed it, but win 2 of the next 5 games, and neither man ever has to buy himself a meal or drink in this town again.

It's almost better the Sox won a 2-1 game against this team heading to Colorado. As hard as the Sox bats can hit at times, they can also go quiet for long stretches in a game, and suddenly you realize they've lost 3-1, despite strong pitching. Everyone talked about how all Colorado was looking for was a split at Fenway for a chance to close it out at home. Now that chance is gone, and even with the prospect of having to sit Lowell, Ortiz, or Youkilis for three games in an NL park, the worst-case scenario seems to be coming back to Fenway with the Sox having a 3-2 lead. Of course, the true worst-case scenario is coming back down 3-2 to Colorado, but does anyone think Beckett won't get it done in Game 5, even if the Sox only score a couple of runs for him? Remember, this is the meat-man we're talkin' about.




Thursday, October 25, 2007

James Brown rules

I had to break out the Blues Brothers DVD this week. It was mandatory viewing in my household from 1984-1989 or so. Simply classic. By the way, Blues Brothers 2000 never happened. Thankfully I've never seen it and never will...as it has never happened...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lGo9Xe5dPos

Brother: "This week's sermon is from our beloved...the Reverend Cleophus James!"

Rev. Cleophus: "And now, people.....and now, people...when I woke up this morning, I heard a disturbing sound. I said, when I woke up this morning I heard a disturbing sound. What I heard was the jingle-jangle of a thousand lost souls. And I'm talking about the souls of mortal men and women, departed from this life. Wait a minute! Those lost, anguished souls roamin' unseen over the earth...seekin' the divine light...that they'll not find...because it's too late!... tooooooo laaaaaaaate yeah, too late for them to ever see again, the light they once chose not to follow! Alright now, alright...don't be lost when the time comes! For the day of the Lord cometh, as a thief in the night. Aaaaaaaaamen...can I get an Amen! Can I get an Amen! Well, well, well...."

The Extra-Large Sopranos Post

It took me about five years to get into the Sopranos....from the time I knew of its existence in 2000, to late 2005 when I decided, "hey, I'll watch a few episodes since Comcast is showing all of their episodes On Demand". For the record, I've since cancelled Comcast and hate most cable shows these days - Nip/Tuck & The Shield are two exceptions.

When I finally started watching the show, tearing through On Demand episodes like they were going to disappear into thin air - in all fairness, each season was only On Demand for two weeks or so at a time - I realized what all the hullabaloo was about. (Yes, I went there - I used hullabaloo.)

A bit of background is necessary as to why I ignored the show for so long: I grew up in an Italian-American family; that much should be obvious by now. We were hot-headed, a bit crazy at times...who am I kidding; sometimes we went after each other with knives like Hannibal Lecter looking for his next appetizer. In fact, I think that happened last week. Even though myself & one of my siblings have moved out, the house in which we grew up is still the epicentre for most of the stress & knife-fights in our lives.

So forget that past tense crap - we ARE crazy, we ARE hot-headed. We do embarrass the hell out of ourselves and each other, whether it's in public or at some one's house. We do talk about people behind their backs, we do have serious family issues, we do have one or two aunts and/or uncles that could very well be considered certifiably insane - but we're too afraid to turn them over to the authorities because of what those authorities might think of, or do, to us.

That said, I always felt my family and Italian friends carried ourselves with a certain amount of class, dignity, and pride...most of the time. My father, for example, is one of the most intelligent and well-rounded men I've ever met; my mother is not only intelligent but has done her very best to make a nice home for everyone who walks in. The woman just can't do any better at welcoming people into her home and being a class act to any guests she has. I've been to a Midwestern home in the middle of Wisconsin for the holidays and been treated very well - and I still feel my Sicilian mother has all that 'heartland' crap beat by a mile when it comes to food, atmosphere, personality, and treatment of family & guests. You just can't do a better job - in short, I've been extremely lucky.

I've been told by people that I have classic, and very good, taste (likely due to my siblings, and that I've also been told by more than one person). I don't wear huge gold emblems around my neck, I don't have an Italian sticker on my car (OK, some of you are laughing about what I have IN my car, but let's keep that an inside joke). Maybe I have a bit of a fetish for certain things that could be considered "Guido" - the color black, for instance; nice-looking shoes; and if I had the build of a soccer player I'm pretty sure I would buy an entire outfit - cleats, shin-guards, and all - from soccer.com/eurosport, and dress up like Fabio Cannavaro for every single casual Friday here at the office.

The point here, is that us Boston-area Italians don't relate well to New Jersey and that whole "tacky" Italian crowd. I was relieved when Chase decided to highlight those differences in Season 3 when Tony went to Italy with Paulie & Silvio, only to find out that those tacky Jersey Italians were out of place around the Napoletani. There are plenty of Guidos and tacky Italians here in the Boston area, of course; Boston has more Italian-Americans than most people realize, because the city is more known for its Irish inhabitants - but even Martin Scorsese only mentioned Italians in passing at the very beginning of The Departed.

I thought of the Sopranos as candy for the American public to devour each week, so they could keep on believing that middle-aged Italian men really acted the way Gandolfini, Van Zandt, et al acted on screen. Once I got past my own issues with the Italian-American element of the show - and learned that one of the main writers of the show is actually from East Boston and that the show was originally supposed to take place in Providence - I figured, what the hell, I'll give it a shot.

It turned out to be one of the best shows I've ever seen, but I always kept in mind that most people were probably sitting there, believing that Carmella must be your typical Italian-American Princess wife. In reality, despite what the viewers thought about all that, Chase was a genius at not only character development, but character consistency. For example, even though we always kept rooting for AJ, deep down we knew that he would never really change, that he was the Fredo of the family, and Chase was true to that character. He was also true to Tony when he had Tony kill Christopher out of apparent mercy toward the end of Season 6. But that's the great thing about the show & its characters - Tony is a sociopath, saw the tree branches cutting through the empty baby seat after that car accident with Chris in Season 6, imagining what would have happened had Chris' baby been in there, and decided right then it was time for Christopher to go. Tony had just been in a car accident with Chris due to Chris, the driver, being high...knowing that, but still being rattled by it, rattled by an injury, and wanting his nephew to survive should have been enough for him to at least stay on the phone with 911. Instead, he saw those tree branches cutting through the empty baby seat in the back, folded his phone up calmly, and made a wonderfully typical Tony Soprano move by suffocating a motionless & barely breathing Christopher, in a supposed 'mercy kill'. It was very appropriate for Tony to be the direct cause of Christopher's death in circumstances so fitting - Christopher being high, Tony almost dying for a SECOND time and knowing Christopher was to blame for it, and all the history between the two characters. He killed Christopher - out of mercy. Or was it?

Season 6, as much as I hated it at times, was a great season about death - particularly the last few episodes. The feel of the show was highlighted by a looming villain in the excellent Frank Vincent, and scenes were shot with plenty of gray texture and feel - AJ sitting on the diving board of the pool, about to throw himself in during a suicide attempt on a cloudy day; Tony eating the deadly orange in the last episode with a black coat on; the entire family wearing black clothes in the last episode; the eerily religious mural on the wall with some orange mixed in (there's that color again) at the restaurant during the final scene. Even the fact that they went into hiding at a house near the beach, which represented the broken Soprano family - Tony nearly bought a beach house for himself & his family on the Jersey shore at the end of Season 4, but him and Carmella split for Season 5 and he had to back out of the deal.

Good or bad, the point here is that it's just television, and we should be grateful for the fact that we got as much entertainment out of it as we did for so long. I'm reminded of a commercial for the new Dennis Miller series starting November 4th on Fox, when he talks about professional sports and all of the horrible things going on that we conveniently ignore for the sake of our own ignorance & entertainment: "When are we going to finally turn away, folks?", he asks. When, indeed - if people can really write for days on end about Barry Bonds instead of simply ignoring him and his outrageous, cheating feat, maybe that would shift the attitude of the people in this country around just enough so that we would turn our attention to the things that really matter. Like politics, for instance, which has become a disgusting, perverted joke.

Sounded like another silly tangent, didn't it? You've been punk'd - it was, in fact, a perfect segue into my favorite David Chase interview quote. The link to the rest of the interview is below. As much as I hated David Chase for the mediocre last two seasons of the show, you can't blame a guy for taking the millions that were waved in front of his face to keep churning out episode after episode. You CAN blame him for the terrible finale, but please, try to put things in perspective as he does here:

EW: Did you expect people to be so pissed off?
DC: We didn't expect them to be that pissed for that long. It's one thing to be deeply involved with a television show. It's another to be so involved that all you do is sit on a couch and watch it. It seemed that those people were just looking for an excuse to be pissed off. There was a war going on that week and attempted terror attacks in London. But these people were talking about onion rings.

http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,20152845,00.htm

WS Game 1 - Red Sox win, 13-1

Out of 103 World Series played, last night's game had...


- The largest margin of victory in Game 1 of a World Series, as well as the highest amount of runs scored by a single team in Game 1 of the Series (13)

- The Sox tying (8) for most extra base hits in a World Series game in the fifth inning (which would have been broken easily had the Rockies not walked home a few runs in the later innings)

- The Sox going an entire turn through their lineup (all nine hitters) in one inning WITH TWO OUTS. That's right...nine straight hitters reaching base, which is what happened in the bottom of the fifth when the game became hopelessly out of reach for Colorado.

- The Sox capping a three-game tear by scoring double-digits in Games 6 & 7 of the ALCS as well as Game 1 of the World Series. No other team in history has four straight postseason games with 10+ runs.

- Oh, and the first time meat actually caught fire on the field of a World Series game. I think I saw some flames shoot out from the meat that Beckett threw. That's right...he hurled MEAT.

I think about 500 other first-time World Series events occurred last night too, which isn't surprising given Beckett was on the mound, and a 5-foot-4 midget, who could double as Nelson De La Rosa (a.k.a. Mahow) is hitting home runs every time he steps to the plate. I mean, even the Sox' leadoff guy is hitting meatballs into the stands, and on a regular basis. As for Beckett, he came very close to tying the consecutive strikeout record to start a World Series Game 1. He gave up a double in the second inning after four consecutive K's to start the game, and then promptly struck out the next of the Rockies.

Was it a World Series game, or JV vs. Varsity? The Sox have put together a run that is highlighting Patriots-like dominance on the field. If Schill can deliver tonight, this should be a short Series.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Goonies forever...

Below, in my Lost Boys 2 post, I managed to refer to myself as an "80's culture revivalist". I like important-sounding titles, so I will try to live up to mine.

I feel it is my duty to report to you on the goings-on of one group of 80's heroes called The Goonies.

http://movies.aol.com/where-are-they-now/goonies?deeplink_level0=0

Oh and just for laughs, Sean Astin is actually talking about a Goonies 2. Unfortunately, only a few of the actors from the original are pathetic enough to actually consider acting in a sequel to the original, so it'll be either animated or contain new characters. Either way, this new direction will piss me off about as much as my brother-in-law learning of a sequel to one of his favorite all-time movies, The Sandbox.

Alfa Romeo - returning to the states by 2050



It feels like Alfa Romeo (owned by Fiat SpA) might as well say, "we're coming back to the United States sometime before 2050". They've been talking about it for years, and finally it seems that the above pictured car, the 8C Competizione, will be available at Maserati dealerships for the 2009 model year, followed up by the 159 sedan, Brera coupe, and 8C Spider in following years (much less expensive models that will compete with the Mercedes E-class, Audi A4, etc.). Couple of reasons this is important:

- Alfa Romeo rules. In terms of production cars, they are way ahead of the curve in terms of interior & exterior design, using Pininfarina for their unbelievably beautiful models.

- Fiat was always a global giant, but now it appears their return to the US will be somewhat restrained, first sharing space at Maserati dealerships, and then attempting to break into the crowded mid-level luxury segment. The Brera should be about the cost of a loaded up Audi A4, and the 159 sedan will likely compete with Audi A6/Benz E-class/BMW 5-series, which will be tough but doable if they price it right. One of my friends asked me, "what about parts costs?" recently. Well, for a car like the 8C which will cost over $100K, parts will probably cost around the same as parts for a Maserati. But for the 159 sedan, Brera, and Spider, parts cost may be cheaper than people realize due to all three cars sharing chassis and parts with other Fiat models in Europe and globally. This could be a huge advantage...people don't realize that other European brands like VW, Audi, Benz, BMW don't have astronomical parts prices anymore, so hopefully Fiat doesn't stand out with more expensive parts than the competition.

- Alfa will likely offer a variety of engine & drivetrain combinations, as most of their designs (except the 8C) include a FWD or AWD chassis option in Europe. They also have a bunch of diesel, 4-cyl turbo, and normally aspirated V6 engines they can mix & match with many of those chassis. Toward the end of their first stint in the US, ending in 1994, Alfa was never known for variety, as their stubborn dealers figured the cars would sell themselves. It appears Fiat finally has a decent plan to break back into this market, albeit at a snail's pace.

- And, finally, if they do come back by 2010, I'm waiting a few years for a used 159 sedan to go on sale and selling my Nazi sled to go Alfa. The resale value on these will likely follow suit with Audi, especially in the Northeast where there's a glut of AWD luxury cars in the used market, meaning I may actually be able to afford one. Alfa doesn't really have the performance attributes of BMW on their lower scale models, nor the luxury nameplate of Mercedes or Lexus, but it'd still be f'n cool to own one.

WS, Game 1, tonight at 8:30pm...



...or whenever they can wake up Tim McCarver and remind him of his job as a color man on Fox.


Read my Beckett/Meat post below. He's ridiculous. I have a feeling he'll have 11K's again and confuse Colorado to the point where they don't even know what part of the country they're in when it's all over. In short...Beckett will, once again, hurl the meat.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Thirty days of absolute boredom

That's what this movie felt like, anyway.

Thanks, buddy. That movie sucked, and I blame you. Think about how low my film standards are, and then tell me that you can look yourself in the mirror tomorrow morning when you realize that even I hated this piece of trash.

They even used the line "I'm coming with you" in this movie. Cliche doesn't quite cover it.

The first of many Oasis posts

At the behest of my brother in law, I am putting together a string of Oasis posts. This is the first one. It mostly concerns the album Be Here Now, as it was the first Oasis album for which I counted down to the release date, and actually purchased the album at midnight, August 26, 1997, at Tower Records.

Oasis is my all-time favorite band. No, they don't have the musical ability of Rush, or the variety of music & experimentation that Radiohead brings to the table. Oasis being my favorite band has as much to do with their attitude as it does the fact that I'm clinging to the 90's like a madman in advance of reaching a milestone age within two years.

Still, Liam's voice is probably the best rock n' roll voice out there right now, and Noel just has a knack for the right rhythm and melody at the right time. Noel's a true rock songwriter and Liam is your prototype of the rock god: snarling when drunk, cocky all the time, blissfully unaware that his best days are likely behind him. To hear pure classic rock by a young(er) generation, there really is no better, as Noel apparently stopped collecting records sometime in the 70's.

While Oasis have hogged the limelight in the UK non-stop since 1994, Oasis' attitude-filled act wore on American fans in the late 90's and the media abandoned them, after the success of Morning Glory and Definitely Maybe. While everyone - and I mean EVERYONE - was praising Be Here Now in advance of its August 1997 release (yes, even Rolling Stone, content to believe that their 4-star review of Be Here Now never happened because they won't publish the rest of it online despite my repeated, ignored requests), just as many people abandoned ship when they figured out that this was - GASP! - a cocaine album.

OK, it's a bit bloated, the songs aren't as good as on Morning Glory, Magic Pie never happened in the eyes of most Oasis fans, yada yada. For all its faults, the album captured, perfectly, a moment in time: the moment that Oasis didn't sidestep, but barrelled through Bono & the boys to become the best band in the world in 1996 & most of 1997. Unfortunately, that moment was short-lived.

It also captured the same essence of Morning Glory, highlighted by the fact that Noel himself admitted the album was nothing more than glorified pub rock outside Abbey Road studios in 1997: this was a bunch of regular guys making it big, who wore their 60's and 70's rock heroes right on their sleeves, proudly displayed for everyone to see. As with Morning Glory & Definitely Maybe, Be Here Now had b-sides that were better than some of the studio tracks (come on...Digsy's Diner and She's Electric are better than Acquiesce and Sad Song?) only this time, Oasis were on such a short leash and the stakes were so high, they couldn't afford anything less than a five-star effort. When they figured that out, they locked themselves into a studio and snorted cocaine for a few months, then released the results on a disc.

From 1994-1996, Oasis was making headlines in front of a shocked & awkward American public, who had just spent the better half of the early 90's heaping praise on groups like Pearl Jam and Nirvana (lest you think Oasis & their UK brethren is all I listen to, I absolutely love Soundgarden). Well, Noel made his feelings quite clear on "downer" music with this quote:

"Nothing bothers me more than when groups like Pearl Jam and Nirvana whine and moan and complain about life and being famous. Let me tell you, being famous is great! The feeling when someone asks you for an autograph, unbelievable! I just think Americans are tired of people telling them how crap their lives are. I think when people listen to our music, we tell them how good their lives could be. I guess I just can't understand the thoughts of Eddie Vedder or that whole bit... I mean, lad, if you hate your job so much, why don't you fuckin' go work at a car wash or McDonald's or something?"

Wow. A rock star who loved being a rock star. No one in the U.S. had been allowed to love being a rock star since....? Hm, maybe the hair bands of the 80's? The early Stones? At the very least, Oasis reminded of us of what makes rock stars tick, no matter how much Eddie Vedder tries to hide it.

Compounding the 7-million selling "failure" of Be Here Now, the ending of the 'alt-rock' scene of 1995-1998 didn't help Oasis...and this shift in the music scene was one of the strangest things I've ever witnessed in the music industry. Here it is, the year after I started college, a couple years after Oasis made it big, Garbage & the Pumpkins had toured together, Bush blew people away at the 1996 Music Awards...and suddenly people are listening to Limp Bizkit, as if the country had suddenly descended into the depths of white trash. The Smashing Pumpkins released a goth-industrial record that just didn't quite cut it because Billy Corgan forgot how to play guitar in 1998, and the Chemical Brothers just didn't do enough for people in terms of widespread commercial appeal. Oasis were done touring the world and were enjoying their riches and cocaine back in England, and the Verve (hopefully that'll be the comeback of 2008) fell off the map just as quickly as they had stolen some of that limelight away from Oasis. Suddenly the entire alt-rock scene fell apart. Everyone realized that Bush was pretty terrible, and the one-hit wonder bands like Primitive Radio Gods (hey, they did give us Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth with Money in My Hand) were never to be heard from again.

Oasis formed a decent comeback album in 2005 - they were suddenly selling out the arenas in the US they should have been selling out all along, as Sony finally began promoting them in the States again. This couldn't have had anything to do with the fact that Oasis had just released their last album under Sony's label...could it? Oasis, like Radiohead, are a band without a record deal, so the next few months leading up to whatever they release should be interesting; and they have a reason to be pissed off based on the lack of promotion they received in the States from 1997-2004.

Thanks, I'm here all week. You can always just watch the VH1 Behind the Music special and get pretty much the same information though. Suckers.

One always looks neat, in a hat made from meat.



Happy day! One night after I rediscovered my love of human cannibalism on film, I had yet another ridiculous email back-and-forth with my buddy GB. GB and I like to joke about meat, and he is mostly repsonsible for my love of the word "meat" (see blog posting below). This particular back and forth ultimately pointed to, as always, meat. In my google search for a nice meat-hat picture, I stumbled upon a site called hatsofmeat.com. Some choice excerpts (cuts?) are included below, but I encourage an actual visit to the site.


This here internet thing is truly amazing. I've finally found out that goons like me DO exist elsewhere!

Ring in the New Year in Manhattan's Central Park with party hats of beef and chicken teriyaki! A barbecue and concert make this an old acquaintance that should not be forgot. For one night, New York City becomes 'Meathattan!'

Q: Is there such thing as a wig or toupee of meat?A: Yes. Manhattan’s trendy “Meatheads” shop offers a wide selection of hair replacement options made entirely of meat.

The expression “I’ll eat my hat” traces back as far as the 19th century, usually credited to Abraham Lincoln in reference to one of his trademark stovepipe hats, which were often made of tenderloin.

Monday, October 22, 2007

Sox, Pats...ridiculous yet?

Sox take the last three games of the ALCS to win in Game 7; Patriots beat Miami 49-28 (and Miami shouldn't have even had that many points).

There just aren't enough superlatives for me to write about at the moment...will have to wait until the World Series (Wednesday, Game 1), when I'm not quite so speechless.

The Verve, Part II

The Verve's big announcement in today's NME (NME.com) is that they are following suit with Radiohead...to a degree. At www.nme.com/theverve, you can now download (for seven days only, beginning today) THE brand new track, from The Verve. As far as I know, it's the only new Verve track that exists, as their new album isn't due out until next year.

Apparently this track is a nearly-15 minute jam session of the very first time the four ex-and-now-once-again bandmates were in a studio together, earlier this year. The results are excellent; Ashcroft's voice is in top form and the funky bass mixed with psychedelic guitars is classic Verve. This album is going to be huge, at least in the UK, where they still know their rock & roll. Here, people would rather buy Britney Spears & Jessica Simpson, than listen to a real band.

Friday, October 19, 2007

Bruegger's and the sub-average individuals

Back in my college days, myself and my friend PS (again...not using real names on here for the sake of the innocent) would occasionally study at the Bruegger's Bagels in Kenmore Square. It allowed us some fresh air outside of the nearby dorms, as well as interaction with people. Plus, you know, it's the middle of Boston - SOME hot chicks must be walking by at some point, right? Not that we couldn't see that in our dorm, but ... well, let's just move on.

PS would always get some strange combo, like a blueberry bagel with strawberry cream cheese. I figured, hey, what the hell - creature of habit that I am, I still want to try something new and tasty, and we're here all day, so why not have TWO crazy bagels? Good times. Lots of studying actually got done, which is surprising. Lots of great, forgotten moments occurred as well, but one remains in my mind, and remains a great joke for both of us to this very day.

One day, I was talking about the fact that my mother and I had gone to that very Bruegger's when moving me into the area a few months prior, to get a quick bite to eat and a coffee. It was right around the corner from where I was living. I told PS, that when my mother & I had been there, she pointed out that she hated the cashier and most of the employees as they "had an attitude". PS decided he would lift his head up from studying - pencil in hand, nose in book - and make an astute observation about all of the individuals in the place at that moment, while nodding his head, all professor-like:

"Hmm...I'd say the overall quality of the people in this room is below average."

I cracked up & couldn't stop. This was maybe eight years ago now but the way he said it and the tone of voice was perfect. It's really quite an observation, when you think about it - looking around and realizing you simply would never want to speak to any of these people you are in the same room with, eating with, in any other situation. You're merely tolerating their presence. This sometimes is lost on college kids, jaded from lack of personal space and roommates with disgusting habits. Kind of reminds me of Thom Yorke, who sometimes brings up the American commuter hell by saying "you're sitting there, in traffic, not moving..and you're thinking to yourself, 'there MUST be something else I should be doing'."

The Verve

Most of you know I love Oasis, U2, Radiohead, Rush, Aerosmith, White Stripes, Pumpkins, etc. etc. A lot of 90's stuff, in other words. My brother in law (and a friend of mine) always tries to open my eyes to new, awesome music (he was listening to the Stripes and the Strokes before either band hit it big, he's a huge Belle & Sebastian fan, and he will mow you down with his useless britpop knowledge & library). However, I'm a creature of habit, and I usually just alternate between the music I've been listening to since high school, with a few bands and comedians thrown in to occasionally spice things up.

The Verve is a band on an entirely different level. Now, I don't think they are 'better', per se, than Oasis or Radiohead. But they are different, and the way they approached britpop was fairly unique. If you haven't listened to Urban Hymns, you WILL become addicted to that album, if only for a short while. My personal fave off of that album is Weeping Willow. It's got a great riff, a psychedelic feel (a Verve special), and one of the best lines to ever come out of britpop: "And the world don't stop...there is no time for cracking up, believe me, friend...". Wow...hits home for me, at least, but it's more in the presentation and Ashcroft's voice, so go listen to it.

I saw them in 1998 at Harborlights, before it became Bank of Boston Pavilion, then Bank of America Pavilion, and I don't even know what it's called now. The show itself sucked...the guitarist responsible for that groovy/psychedelic feel had left the band (Nick McCabe), and Ashcroft was in full "I don't give a fook" mode with a pint glass full of beer DURING EACH SONG in the entire setlist. That's right, saving his voice for a night when he needed it, perhaps. Needless to say they sounded a bit off that night, but they still put on a good "performance", just not a good "show". That was about the end of that for The Verve and they broke up later in the year. Now, somehow, they are back. Check out today's nme.com page, or just check out http://www.theverve.tv/ for more information. They are apparently recording music for Ashcroft to add vocals, which is good, because Ashcroft and McCabe in the studio together at the same time may result in one or both of them being killed. Good times. If The Verve's new record reaches even a 5 on the Radiohead scale, it'll be a huge success and hopefully they'll come back to the States, to tour with Oasis.

Ralph Snart

Some of you may not know who, or what, Ralph Snart is.

These sites should help. Figured I would let those of you who don't know me very well in on the secret. Oh, did I mention I have an autographed beer stein with Ralph Snart on it? Yeah, I really am that lame.

http://www.marchansenstuff.com/ (or http://www.ralphsnart.com/). Click around and dig into the site, it'll help.

http://www.marchansenstuff.com/fansite/. Good site, to which I've actually contributed in the past.

Marc Hansen used to have all his past Snart stuff online to read, but unfortunately, he struck a deal to re-publish some of this stuff in hard copy, to which the publishers replied, "well, take down the online stuff and you got a deal".

And how did I come across this frightening hobby? My father's friend, with a son about my age, introduced me to Ralph Snart in 1988. That's right, about fourth grade or so. I told everyone about it and became the most annoying little jerk in elementary school. That label kinda stuck until college, by the way...anyway, I still have every Snart volume one could have purchased up through the mid-1990's, sealed in bags and backboards up in my parent's attic. It's about time I go up there and become even MORE lame by reading through all of them, in hard copy, once again. See you in about three weeks.

Lost Boys 2

Most of you might ask, "Wait a minute - what was the FIRST Lost Boys movie about?" For experienced 80's culture revivalists like myself (ok, I was about 7 when the original movie came out, but my older sibling made damn sure I was scared of vampires after Lost Boys), Lost Boys was a classic vampire tale re-told in solid 80's form. Keifer Sutherland (I can't watch 24 - he's a vampire, FOR REAL, and that's the end of it) was amazing as a vampire goon who drinks bloodwine, has a vampire posse, and has the ability to make chinese rice look like maggots. "How are the maggots, Michael? Those are maggots you're eating."

Anyway, apparently Corey Feldhaim (oops, sorry, they're two people - Corey Feldman and Corey Haim) are no longer buds. The short-lived reunion ended abruptly when Feldman apparently felt "something is wrong" with his 80's straight-to-video acting partner. After seeing those recent MTV shows where Feldman guest-starred and did nothing but talk about how his parents messed him up (I think his most memorable performance in the 90's was on Married...With Children), I can't believe one of them would actually be judging the other.

Oh well. You know Lost Boys 2 is going to be a classic when the sixth person on the cast listing is "Screaming Woman".

http://omg.yahoo.com/corey-feldman--corey-haim:-no-longer-friends/news/3214

Beckett threw the meat last night


That's right. Not the 'heat', but the 'meat'. I guess considering a 'meatball' is a term reserved for a hanging fastball down the middle of the plate, it doesn't make much sense to use the word 'meat' in place of 'heat' when speaking of a ridiculous 1ER/8inning/11K performance when it mattered most. Beckett certainly brought the heat last night. I just like to call it 'meat' because it's hilarious to think of the baseball as a ball of meat heading down the plate. Why this isn't done in baseball more often, I guess we'll never know. If I were a pitcher, I'd sneak a meatball or two in there, just for laughs.

Beckett is what Clemens should have been to the Sox, especially in the playoffs. We finally have our very own Roger Clemens, folks. Clemens never came up big when he needed to save for one or two playoff games, but given the amount of postseason games he's played, that's not saying much. Paul Byrd has come up big twice for Cleveland this postseason already, so again: it's not saying much. Clemens is supposed to be this legendary toughguy pitcher. Well, Beckett is better. And he's from Texas, too. What else could you possibly want?

Side note: I couldn't find a picture of Beckett's reaction, but if you watched the game last night, you saw that strange interaction with Lofton. On a 3-1 pitch, Lofton threw his bat down about 0.0001 seconds after the ball hit Varitek's glove - the umpire wasn't fooled, and called it a strike. Beckett, calm as ever, winds up to deliver the next pitch. It's a pop up, and from the replay, you could tell Beckett knew it RIGHT after it left Lofton's bat. Beckett immediately opened his mouth to scream something at Lofton. He's been pissing off the Sox this entire series. He's a great player, but not moving his ass into the batter's box and dropping his bat on a clear strike as if he's about to walk on a 3-1 pitch tends to get under the skin of immature millionaire frat-boy types. Still, I loved seeing Beckett let out a warcry as Lofton waited for the ball to be caught in center field, then having Lofton try to get in Beckett's face. Beckett, like a Siberian Husky being taunted and annoyed by a Pug, just smiled and waited for Lowell and the ump to get involved and take ol' Kenny away.

7-1 Sox. ALCS is now at 3-2 in favor of Cleveland. Everyone knows the Sox can put this away at home (even with the freightening prospect of Dice-K pitching Game 7...albeit on a very short leash), so I hope Casey Blake and his beard are ready to be disappointed.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

It's for you...I want YOU to have it!


One of the best cinematic moments of all time was when good ol' character actor Frederic Forrest showed up (where the hell had he been since Apocalypse Now, anyway?) in Falling Down.

Background: Falling Down was a movie I watched every single day for a 3 month period in 1994 when it made its way onto the Pay-Per-View channels. It was released in the cinema in the spring of 1993. Back in the mid-90's, we had one of them cable black-boxes which unscrambled all the PPV channels. The thing is, they didn't have an OnDemand menu back then, so they just showed their feature movie of the month for days on end without stopping, and when people wanted to pay for it, the cable company would direct them to a channel and a time. The only way this could possibly be convenient would be if they were showing the movie all the time, so people wouldn't have to wait. So it was kinda like dedicated channels to individual movies, before one could pause or record live TV on a box, and of course the selections were limited as there were maybe 10 "real" movies and then a bunch of spice to watch in the wee hours. Of course, this sucked...unless you were like me in high school; a goon with an addictive personality who loved homophobic Nazi surplus-store owners with sudden & severe moodswings.

This has gone down as a CLASSIC scene in cinema. OK, only for me, but still...you have to see the humor. Fred Forrest plays this part to sheer brilliance, and it's no wonder he was never heard from again after Nick the Nazi met his doom at the business end of a knife AND gun. Who could possibly top this performance? If I was a filmmaker, I'd make it big with a really great Boston film (apparently we're still waiting for that film) and then, after winning an Oscar, I would come back with a re-make of Falling Down just to piss everyone off - except I'd re-work the script so the ENTIRE STORY is about these precious seven minutes with Nick. I would, of course, play Nick - or hire GB for the part, who can't even be described in the same post as Nick for fear my head will explode. Now, who to play Michael Douglas' character? The ol' fart could come back for one more smackdown as Bill "D-Fens" Foster, don't ya think? Well, you tell me - watch the clip.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3TKrMbM0K6E

Oh, and besides me, there are other goons out there who seem to have made Nick a bit of a cult hero. There are many Nick-related pages at ytmnd.com; I'll edit this post to link to more than just the below 4 later on. Strange site overall, but even more strange that someone actually thought to post this crap online after 14 years. Is it time to call Falling Down a cult classic? Methinkso.

http://faggotshit.ytmnd.com/
http://faggotshit2.ytmnd.com/
http://stupidlittlehat.ytmnd.com/
http://giveittome.ytmnd.com/

Nick Soundboards:
http://www.shockinghumor.com/soundboards/3161/Falling_Down_-_Nick_the_Nazi
http://goarcade.net/page.php?p=soundboards&do=view&id=178
http://www.soundboards.com/?view=84

[Edit 10/19/07: No, I'm not a homophobe and I apologize for the site names on the first two links above. All you politically correct types, keep your hippie-mouths shut and bask in the humor. I never said this blog was Rated G, now, did I?]

ANUS!

Gotta love http://www.anus.com/. By far one of the best sites out there. This is one of their newer entries, by none other than SPR.

http://www.anus.com/zine/articles/prozak/blackwater/

They even used the word "crotchety". I mean, who wouldn't love that??

The Azzurri, Marshalls, and weird fishes

Well, idle Italy fell a spot in the Euro 2008 standings when France won and Scotland lost yesterday. However, they are playing Scotland on 11/17 which should be a fun game. Actually, Italy wasn't idle - they played a friendly against 2010 World Cup host South Africa, and won 2-0. Italy plays 11/17 and 11/21 in their last two qualifiers...so they can decide their own fate at this point, if they can beat Scotland.

Went to Marshalls last night with the missus. This was a really "nice" one, one town over. They had an okay selection of men's stuff; most of it seemed to be women's and houseware type stuff though. I had to listen to some illegal immigrant talk on her phone about some "white bitch" who pissed her off while she was driving, or something. Gotta love ingrates...that "white bitch" very likely helps pay the government's rent fee on the project she lives in. OK, maybe that's unfair. Actually, screw it, it's not. When people act like trash in public, alternating between spanish and english on a cell phone and being damn sure everyone around them can hear EXACTLY what they're saying, I can't help but to assume the person IS trash. Show me otherwise and I'll change my mind, but in the meantime, you're nothing.

Then the very talented, very qualified cash register jockeys at Marshalls completely ignored me for 15 minutes. If not for my wife's stuff, I would have dropped the stuff I had and just left the store. One woman even went so far as to go alllllll the way around me to the other side of the line and wait in back of another woman at a register...which was akin to cutting me in line. I blew past her in my car on the way out of the parking lot, though SO WHO GOT THE LAST LAUGH?? HUH?? Yeah, I'm sick.

After a lovely dinner prepared by the missus - no, really! [Edit: this comment, "no, really!" was not taken well by the missus. What i mean here is that everything else in this blog is sarcastic, but I was being quite serious when I wrote that my dinner was lovely. My wife can outcook you AND your mother any day of the week. Continue on!] - including fish and veggies, I then listened to a song called "Weird Fishes/Arpeggi" from the new Radiohead album. Very appropriate. That song is really good - go download it, it's nearly free (http://www.radiohead.com/).

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

MEAT!

I've been fascinated with the word "meat" lately. I have no idea why, but I even thought that a drink should be made of fermented meat, called Meate, with an "e", kinda like Meade. What is wrong with me? I have no idea, and I don't know how anyone in my life can stand me anymore with moments like these (see below - an actual IM conversation between me and a friend):

Me (04:32:31 pm): if italy wins that, they write their ticket into the finals pretty much...all they'd have to do is draw after that

Me (04:34:12 pm): yeh...gonna be a meat-fest

Me (04:34:17 pm): they're gona feed scotland some raw meat yeh

Me (04:34:20 pm): during the game

Ant’ny (04:34:22 pm): LOL

Me (04:34:22 pm): when it's 7-0

Me (04:34:27 pm): scotland will need to eat raw meat to stay in the game

Me (04:34:30 pm): they should do this once a year

Me (04:34:33 pm): have a meat-match

Me (04:34:38 pm): dude

Me (04:34:39 pm): i'm tapped

Me (04:34:41 pm): off the deep end

Me (04:34:42 pm): kaput

Ant’ny (04:35:01 pm): done

Me (04:35:07 pm): all done

Ant’ny (04:35:12 pm): d'aoh

Me (04:35:13 pm): i need to just start writing shit

Ant’ny (04:35:18 pm): lol

Ant’ny (04:35:19 pm): make a movie

Me (04:35:24 pm): and selling it as a reality show or something

Me (04:35:27 pm): make a movie w/ ant'ny

Me (04:35:30 pm): call it pie

Me (04:35:31 pm): not Pi

Me (04:35:34 pm): the indie classic

Me (04:35:35 pm): but Pie

Ant’ny (04:35:41 pm): lol

Me (04:35:44 pm): where one man thinks he has the answers to a perfect PIE

Ant’ny (04:35:44 pm): have u seen

Ant’ny (04:35:48 pm): requiem for a dream?

Me (04:35:50 pm): and the government comes after him for the recipe

Me (04:35:54 pm): not yet

Ant’ny (04:36:08 pm): that movie is insaaaane

Sports - 10/17/07

I already spoke about the Sox before. But how 'bout them Patriots? This article by Bill Simmons is a perfect summary of how fans feel about the Pats this year. No one in New England cares about the videotaping scandal anymore. No one here feels Belichick's reputation is tainted. Everyone knows this team is capable of going 19-0. God, I can't wait for the Colts' game Nov. 4th.

I remember saying to my father before the start of the 2005 NFL Season, when the Pats looked like a frontrunner to defend their title for a second straight time, that "I just want the Patriots to HURT people this year." Turns out I was two years too early. After a couple of very memorable seasons in 2005 and 2006, including memorable playoff wins and losses (San Diego, Denver, Indy), they are turning that corner and becoming that ridiculously dominating team you knew they'd become eventually with the perfect squad. They are beating up on the rest of the league by an average of something like 17 points. They saved one of their largest margins of victory this year for a hyped-up 5-0 Cowboys team. They even silenced Terrell Owens BEFORE a game, which no one on Earth figured was possible before last week. And it looks like they might just keep on rollin'.

~~~~~~~~~~~

I found a blog about my favorite international team, the Italian National football team (http://www.figc.it/), last year after the World Cup 2006 victory. Tony from the midwest has a cool blog going about the Italian national team, who have lived up to their recent FIFA #1 world ranking lately. Check his blog for updates on the Azzurri (http://theazzurri.blogspot.com/). They are second only to Scotland in their group standings, Scotland being quite the surprising, breakout team this year, with a HUGE qualifier looming for November 17th between the two. Should be a good one, folks. "Getcha popcorn ready."

Italy are reigning world champs with tons of young talent coming up for World Cup 2010 (South Africa - anyone wanna join me?), with a great shot at taking Euro 2008 by storm. They may be able to tie Brazil with five world cup titles in 2010 if their under-17 and under-21 teams are any indication of what this team can do in coming years. Guys like De Rossi and Gattusso who play their hearts out and give the other team as much flack as possible during games make them even more fun to watch. This is yet another "eff-you" team that I happen to love. Seeing a pattern yet?

spilled coffee everywhere

My wife tells me there should be a soundboard of all my crazy rantings (especially while driving), so I've decided to spew my northeast anger and wit forth into the blogosphere. One thing you won't find here, as long as I can resist, is personal information, names of people, etc. The names of those involved in these silly, daily interactions need to be protected - for the sake of the innocent. I'm not sure what that means, exactly, but it sounds good. You also won't see me posting my name, the name of the company I work for, and other information which could make me an easy target. Just to forewarn you about how this blog will play out.

And away we go:

Coffee was everywhere today. I should have stopped to take a picture of it but I didn't. This is probably the third or fourth time in my professional life that I have spilled coffee all over my cubicle.

You know the worst part? It was lukewarm. I was about to go downstairs and fling it back in the caffe employee's face (or simply ask what the hell cold coffee was doing in one of the bins at 7:30 in the morning, right when they opened). So I accidentally spilled it everywhere, and needed to grab a decrepit, germ-filled sponge from the corporate kitchen, along with oodles of paper towels and napkins, and clean up nearly a half-liter of coffee. My laptop nearly got wet and I think one of the USB ports on my docking station is now ruined. My monitor, luckily, sits on a pedastal, and was unscathed. Now my cube smells like coffee with a hint of lemon-scented dish soap. The sponge was nasty. The cube was nasty. It just sucked. And right after a killer hangover I was hangin' onto. If I was gonna spill anything in my cube, I wanted it to be meat or meat-juice. That would rule, and it would keep people away from me.

The Sox lost 7-3 last night, even after Manny, Ortiz, and Youkilis tried to salvage our season by hitting back to back to back home runs. I can't believe the Sox got to Sabbathia and NOT Byrd or Westbrook. I also can't believe the Sox bullpen is so terrible. It makes zero sense. Oh yeah...Gagne...now it does.

Bit of humor to finish up. Last weekend, I met up with a bunch of co-workers from my former company, who had laid off a whole bunch of people - including all of them - before I left, too. Good times...lots of scotch, beer, and bad food. Well, I had noticed this piece of graffiti on the wall in the men's room, but it was more humorous the second time around. The first thing I noticed about it was the original writer must be foreign based on the grammar. The response definitely came from an American, arrogant wit and all. Here goes:

Original Writer: "Americans do not know about rest of world! GEORGE BUSH IS TERRORIST!!!"
Response [with arrow leading to original msg]: "Fuck you, you third world cunt."

Perfect. It was a curt, concise response, and extremely appropriate. That's right - this is ourrrrrrr country!

More to come, if anyone decides to read this.